Asylummn

To get a better understanding of me,
you've got to know my past.

I'm a flighty creature.
high strung
afraid
can't sit still
anxious
I don't want to be trapped,
and stagnant.

I need someone to care,
and to watch out for me,
because of my self destructive tendencies.
I don't want it though.

I'm my own natural predator.
It's rough, but the truth.

but there was this one time,
i was mentally a little girl,
and i trusted him so much,
apparently with my life.
and we were together,
and i listened to his every word,
and when we parted he said,
" you're a broken girl, and you'll never be fixed."

and it was dark, and i was sleepy, and so i slept.
I slept in his presence, and it was a trusting sleep.

How though, how do you think it feels?
when you trust someone that much,
when you're only a little girl and you think that it's love,
your only option,
and you wake up,

waking up to a brick wall in your face,
and that trust is shattered in an instant.
it hurt, it hurt, it hurt.

and my wrist baby, my small baby bird wrist.
all i wanted was an apology,
i would take it all back,
you could have everything
for a few tiny sorry words.

It was you that broke me,
and it was you telling me that i'd never be fixed.
you were afraid to fix what you had broken in me,
or incapable of doing so.

but i worked, worked, worked at it.
and i cried, cried, cried.

Cried for the aches
and worked to make them better.
so i licked my own wounds,

and said never again.

never again will i be so blind,
never again will i trust the same.

but i'm blind again, puttin my heart on that same line.
so you've got to understand if i'm a little wary
if i'm a little tired
if my wings hurt a little.
i'm trying my best,
and it's sure taken a while.

but eventually i'll be done lickin my wounds
and be that pretty little girl

after all
all that I've seen

innocence is not being unaware.
it's having seen and experienced the worlds dark life,
and choosing to live and see the light side.